My first week

Hello everyone! I have survived my first week of DTS!! It has definitely been an adjustment, but I feel settled in loving it. Swaziland has such a slow, laid back pace. It's easy to fall in love with the place. And the people are so incredibly friendly and helpful.

There are a total of 7 students in DTS: 2 Americans (including myself), 1 Botswanan, 1 Ugandan and 3 Swazis. Quite the mix of cultures. The food has been good. I think my favorite thing they have here is called pap (pronounced "pop"). It's the staple food and is basically cornmeal. But I can't get enough of the stuff. :)

It's quite interesting bathing here. This is running water and showers, but no hot water. So I can either take cold showers or boil water and bathe out of a bucket. It's actually quite fun. I know, I'm weird. But there is something that feels good about conserving water. I mean, I literally bathe in about 5 liters of water a day. It's so cool.

I found a couple running partners here, which has helped to keep me sane. But oh man, it is ALL hills here. I think by the time I get home I'm going to be able to outrun my sister. :)

It has been awesome to be surrounded by like minded individuals and I feel like God has really started to open up my eyes about what He has in store for me. I'm so excited about the weeks to come and what God has for me.

I will be posting pictures as soon as I have a flash drive to transport pictures from my computer to the internet cafe. And as God is revealing things to me, I will be revealing them to you! Oh, I'm getting a cell phone today, so people will be able to call me. :)

Love to you all! You are in my prayers!

Today is the day

Hi all,

Well, the day has finally arrived. There have been months of preparation, days of saying goodbye and hours of packing. It has been difficult saying goodbye to everyone I love, but I'm excited for what comes next. I'm excited to be back in the country that stole my heart and to see where God leads me. And frankly, I'm tired of saying "goodbye" to people and I'm ready to start saying "hello"! :)

I started getting a little nervous this morning as I was taking a shower. I feel like I just have to keep going on auto-pilot so that my nerves don't get the best of me. Just keep breathing and praying, Michelle. I had a great conversation the other night with a really dear friend. She reminded me to remember the last time I heard God speak clearly to me and keep focused on what He spoke to me. I just have to keep remember the heart I have for Africa and its people and that trumps all the difficulties that I have faced and the struggles I will have while I am gone.

For those that want to track my flight or pray for me while I am flying (taking off, especially!) here are my flight details:
I leave PDX at 6:41 pm on 7/14, leave San Francisco at 10:27 pm on 7/14, and JFK at 11:15 am (EST; 8:15 am PST) on 7/15.

Thanks to all of you for your love and support. I will be updating my blog when I am able to and I will let everyone know how they can be in touch with me as soon as I find all that out. For now, email will be my main form of communication. I don't know when or how often I'll be able to check it, but until then, ciao!

8 weeks left

Ok, I have to write about something because having the post about my dog being the last post almost throws me into a crying fit every time. :)

I leave in 8 weeks and 2 days. I know that time is going to go by so quickly. I had a realization recently that 2 weeks is about as long as I can go without seeing my church Family. Anything more than that and I really start to ache to see them. I guess it's a good realization to have now so that it doesn't take me by surprise in about 10 weeks. But the realization of the fact that I am "starting over" is creeping in and it's scary. Less scary since I have Jesus by my side, but scary none the less.

It is so weird juggling the emotions of being SO excited for the next step, but dealing with the emotions of thinking about the limited time I have left here. It's weird to think about how much life will change, but I couldn't be more excited. I'm even more excited knowing that they have Rock Band over there. Actually, when I think about DTS the thing that I am most excited about is worship. I just have this feeling that it is going to be so intense and passionate and I can't wait for that.

Is it weird that I'm already feeling anxious for DTS to be over? I am just so anxious for what God has next for me. Be in the now Michelle, be in the now. :)

Strong Tower

I've had to sing the Kutless song "Strong Tower" to myself over and over again today. Tonight was the night I had to take my dog to his new home. I knew it was going to be difficult, but I didn't know just how difficult it would be. I can't remember the last time I have cried this much, this hard and in such a short amount of time. My heart is breaking, but I know it's temporary and I know that the future holds great things for me and for God's Kingdom. That has to be my focus. Jesus told us that we have to lose our lives to find them and to sell everything we own and give to the poor and follow Him. OK, God. I'm giving You my life. Take it. It's Yours to do with it what You will. Through the pain and the suffering I will praise You because that is what You are worthy of. Jesus knows my pain and He knows what it means to suffer. Like Peter said, I will rejoice in participating in the sufferings of Christ.

Goodbye, Ponce! You were a wonderful dog and I will miss you so much. You will have a wonderful life in your new home!

Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it with good things

Wow, what a journey God has me on. I'm totally blown away by Him. A little over 3 weeks ago I put my house on the market. It's not a good time to try to sell a house. The average time to sell a house is 90 days. That meant that my house should sell about 1 month before i am set to leave. But i knew God would sell my house. And even if He didn't do it before i left, i knew he would do it after i was gone. Never did i expect an offer 3 weeks after i put it on the market. And i definitely did NOT expect 2 offers. 2 offers in this market. And in 3 weeks. Are you kidding me??? WOW!! I have 2 people that both REALLY want my house. One buyer offered the other $1,000 to back out of the offer that i already accepted. WHAT???

I am totally overwhelmed by God's abundant provision. All it required from me was to move out of the way. And now my house is pending a sale and will be someone else's at the end of April. And God is allowing me to walk away with more money than i thought i would. He is so much bigger than i can conceive. I'm so grateful that He desires to pour out His blessing on me in this part of my journey. I still find myself shaking my head and laughing because it is just crazy to me. But He is so good.

Thank you, God for helping me to step out off the ledge and helping me to trust in Your ability to put steps in front of me even thought i can't see them. I am nothing without Your strength.

Saturdays. The best day of the week if you ask me. You can sleep in, take time to ENJOY your morning coffee, do yard work, hike, spend time with your family. What a great day! And today, I had 8 friends give up their Saturdays to help me paint the inside of my house, pressure wash the outside, haul yard debris, replace trim on the windows so I could get my house ready to sell. Wow! It's amazing how loved I feel right now. I have a bunch of clean up that I should be doing right now, but all I can do right now is think to myself how lucky I am. These people truly showed the love of Christ to me today. Thank you to all who gave up time with your families, didn't do work at your own houses, didn't take that day to relax. I wish that someone would create a bigger and better way to say THANK YOU. I am filled to the brim with gratitude. You saved me days and days worth of work. Thank you for sacrificing your precious Saturday to do this for me.

I constantly find myself in awe of God’s orchestration. From big things like working out financial situations to prove that we are on the right path to small things like sitting us next to someone on a plane.

On my flight from Portland to San Francisco, I was sitting next to this woman (it turns out she goes to Good Shepherd). I saw that she was working on stuff for work and I asked what she did for a living. She said, “My vocation is working for Wells Fargo, but my real job is spreading the Kingdom of God.” Oh man, let the gates open!! We started talking about God and our journeys with Him, what He’s done in our lives, etc. It was such an awesome talk and I was gabbing away about God and my testimony. I just felt my heart open and I couldn’t keep from pouring it out on her.

Towards the end of the flight, I got up to use the lou and as I was away from her, satan immediately started attacking me. He was telling me that I was bragging and looking for praise from someone. Then I started replaying every thing in my head that I had said. Was I really doing that? Was I trying to steal God’s glory? I was horrified at that thought and started trying to think of ways that I could share without doing that, but I didn’t know how that was possible because once I start talking about something I am passionate about it just spews out. Then I sit back down next to her and she tells me how great it was to listen to my testimony and how heartfelt and genuine it is. How could she possibly have known that I had just been doubting myself and sharing my story?

As I reflected on it in the next few moments I realized how much God was trying to tell me to NOT stop sharing my story in that way. I have passion and that is an amazing gift that God has given to me. I should not try to keep that under wraps when it comes to sharing His story and my story. Of course satan doesn’t want me to passionately share my story and my walk with God because people might listen and if God puts me in the “right place at the right time” it could ignite or re-ignite a relationship between someone and God. That is the last thing that satan wants and he will what he can to keep that from happening.

I am just so thankful that God reaches us through those times to remind us about the Voice of Truth. His voice is the voice that I want to listen to. His is the voice that will lead us down the right path. His is the voice that provides peace, comfort, hope and love. Anything less is destructive to us and our walk. The next time you are hearing a voice that is telling you to doubt yourself and your value take time to ask yourself, “Is this the Voice of Truth?”